What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

At what stage in your life did you realize, "No, I can't do this any more" and walk out? Why?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

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But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

What is unattractive about a nice guy? Why do some women don’t choose nice guys?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

If women see themselves as free, dignified, human beings just as good as men, can Trump hang it up and just lose in a landslide at last? How can men who like and respect women help improve womens' self-esteem?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

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And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

What advice would you give to a father of a teenage daughter on how to protect her from boys, dating, and social media? How should fathers discuss these topics with their daughters?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

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Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

TEXT:

How can one learn to talk frankly?

Make Nazis afraid again!

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Will my parents go to hell if I don't wear hijab, they tried to convince me and they provided it to me but I don't want to wear it?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

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Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Republicans, why do you support Kamala Harris over Donald Trump?

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.